The Unreal Identity
We all are a part of a society which has the power to influence us and at the same time has the power to change and break us. We are responsible for the society too, I was also the culprit of the same commonness, or maybe I still am, fearing the judgements of people who do not rule my life but at the same time making me feel as if they do and thus ending up in believing them and criticize ourselves, this is such an irony right?
All those people who know me could relate to what I will say quite well, but to all those who do not let me tell you something about myself from the eyes of a stranger. I am a thin girl, under weighted, who does not look like she is in 12th and maybe weights around 43, does not have a perfect figure and probably eats less or is going through something in her life which is the reason for how she is. This is what I have been hearing about myself since I developed understanding and sense. My whole life this is the only feedback I have heard from the world around me. I, being someone who cannot counter back your statements with anger, just laugh off the comment as if it means nothing to me. but in reality all of it left a scare in me which resulted in me over thinking, crying and asking my mother why I was like this and a number of other reactions just known to me. My mother would always comfort me saying it is okay, you are perfect, do not think about what others say. But as we all know it is easier to say then to do.
I am sure this is not the story of just me but a lot many people struggling to ‘look good’ in front of others for their fake acceptance and appreciation. This post is not for those people to stop commenting and judging, it would be great if you did that though, but this post is for people like me struggling to find a place among the ‘perfect’ once and feel good about their own self.
The society and people around you are not going to change. I know you have a lot of frustration for all of them and conflicts with your own self but you cannot do anything about those people. Also think about this, how many times would we have judged people and labelled them as something? We all are part of this; you cannot expect someone to not judge or label you. But it is about what you want to tell yourself. How many times have you looked into a mirror and appreciated what you are rather than feeling bad about those extra fats or thin legs? How many times have you been jealous about someone’s perfect body? We expect people to be good to us and compliment which sadly, we do not even believe exists in us. How is it even appropriate? How many times are you going to see yourself from the eyes of others and hide the true YOU? Why can’t we start embracing our own curves and flaws and first accept our own self before looking for someone to accept those. Who the hell even cares after you start believing yourself and being confident about it? And if you for your own health and satisfaction want to have a perfect figure then go work hard and eat good rather than just complaining and procrastinating.
Drop your unreal identity created by this world and CREATE an identity for yourself.
And to all those who comments about fat girls wearing crop tops or bikinis, not dressing according to their ‘body’ let me tell you that they do not dress for you nor do you have any rights to tell them what they should do. You should instead be proud that all of those are not caring about the world and doing something that they want to. All of us how simply tell each other and state that we should be comfortable in our own skin or talk about making a difference and not care what we are actually doing. It all starts with you remember; your perceptions, actions, opinions which can change the world.
Oh by the way I forgot to genuinely introduce myself to all of you who still do not know me. I am Manasvi Shah, a thin yet a strong soul who believes that she can make a difference in this society with a lot of aspirations and dreams in her eyes and a carefree attitude with immense love for her own self, also, someone who is not just comfortable in her own skin, but someone who is proud of it.
I hope you are too
Manasvi shah. 🙂