Who should be the head of the family?
India is a male dominating society. We all are aware of it, but have all of us accepted this tradition? We live in such a setting because of its historic background, so we cannot change the situation immediately, it is a slow process. To see it positively, we can say that it is an achievement of accepting and enrolling women as equals in a country with a history of such great inequality. But we still have not achieved what we desire. But wait, what do we(women)desire?
Equality?
We are entitled to that right by our constitution.
Freedom?
If not given by the society, we can fight for that right.
We as women or girls are not asking you for these basic rights, ( some are deprived of this too!)
But what i am trying to say here is,
Does the girl wearing shorts and haulters, does a prostitute, a housewife, a professional working woman being given the same respect that they deserve on the grounds of them being a WOMAN?
That is maybe what we desire. A respect by the society for merely being a women irrespective of everything. There was a very heated debate going on in our class, about who should be the head of the family. A man or a woman? And surprisingly there were opposing views to it.
As an individual, what i first believe is that if we are speaking of a family setting, there should be a collective decision making. A democratic approach to it, and not just a man or a woman making decisions on behalf of the whole family. We are all different individuals with different desires, ideas and goals. So there should be no one who takes a decision on our behalf! If that decision is wrong, that individual is responsible for it. The man or woman can take any decision for himself/herself, if they do not hinder or harm other people. This was an individual aspect of who should decide for them.
For a happy environment in any family, everybody in the family should be heard. And what is best for them, should be decided. In certain aspects, a man’s decision is wise and in certain aspects a woman’s. An another point of debate was this: in a research it was seen that, in 100 international companies, 73 have a man as the head. So men are proved to be better heads.
But an apple should be compared with an apple.
Men and women in the past, all over the world were not given equal opportunities to establish and prove themselves, if compared otherwise the result would have been different. So this result, cannot be the base for men being a head. Also, family matters and professional matters are different. So we concluded that this cannot be the basis for deciding who should be the head.
Another very strong point raised in the debate which was quite argumentative and should be taken into consideration was, the biological differences that naturally exists in us. A man is proved to be a better rational thinker than a woman.
And a woman is considered to be a more empathetic and sympathetic decision maker, because of the biological differences.
Speaking of the practical world and not the ‘ideal’ world ( where all opinions are heard) rational thinking is considered better than an emotional decision, which is the strong suit of a man. But is it sufficient and the only aspect? Aren’t there times when certain decisions have to be taken emotionally and not rationally? Aren’t there times when emotions save a relationship? As an individual, I believe that with rational thinking, emotional thinking and decision making is necessary too! We can’t decide which one is better, everything depends upon individual to individual and situation to situation. Speaking again of the family setting, both men and women if collectively take a decision for the family, would be for the best. Rational thinking backed by emotional decision would be the best for the family as a whole.
I do not know what is better for the political world existing outside! But I strongly disagree with the domination of men over women in a family. A woman is strong enough; just give her a chance.
A woman is independent enough; just listen to her.
A woman is powerful enough; just give her that space.
A woman can make her decisions.
A woman can prove herself. But before blaming and judging, have you given her a chance to prove herself? So what do you think about this? Keep smiling and share your views with us.
~Manasvi S.